Conspiracy to Christ | Mark's Faith Part 2

The Three Seeds

I want to take a step back in time; before I found faith, to share some of the pivotal moments that planted seeds of change in my heart and mind. I’ve come to call these defining moments “The Three Seeds.”

Let’s begin.

The Questions Begin

A number of years ago, I started questioning life; not just my personal life, but also the world around me: society, government, media, and culture.

We all have key moments that shape us. For me, there have been several. But three in particular stand out. These weren’t grand, earth-shattering events, but they lingered. They got me thinking, feeling, and searching. And in hindsight, they were the first cracks in my old worldview.

Seed No. 1 - Shaving

Yes, shaving. Stick with me here.

As a teenager, I struggled with eczema, especially on my hands and eventually my neck after I began shaving. If you’ve ever dealt with eczema, you know how maddeningly itchy and frustrating it can be. It affected my confidence, social life, and mental health.

I tried everything. Doctors prescribed steroid creams, ointments, and pills, but nothing worked.

Then one day, a leaflet came through the letterbox offering a free cassette tape (yes, I’m showing my age!). I sent off for it and received two tapes; one titled Dead Doctors Don’t Lie by Dr Joel D. Wallach, and another whose name I sadly can’t remember. But it was the second tape that changed everything.

It introduced me to the idea that harmful chemicals, such as Sodium Laureth Sulphate (SLS) and Propylene Glycol, were found in everyday personal care products, even in items for children and babies!

I switched to alternative, chemical-free products. Within a few months, my eczema cleared up. It never returned.

Seed No. 1 - Distrust

This left me wondering: Why would governments and health organisations allow such harmful ingredients in everyday products, especially ones for children?

That was the first seed: a seed of distrust.I didn’t become a full-blown activist, but I did start telling friends, family, and workmates about what I’d learned. It marked the beginning of a shift in how I viewed the world.

Seed No. 2 - College

At 16, I left school and started working. Around 7–8 years later, I enrolled in an Access to Higher Education course at my local college, with the dream of studying Zoology at university.

The course wasn’t officially full-time or part-time, it was somewhere in between. I also worked evenings in a local bar, but eventually, the demands of study required my full attention. I applied for financial support through Social Security so I could focus on my education.

I was denied.

They told me my course didn’t qualify for support. Fair enough, I thought, until I read the booklet they gave me explaining the rules. Near the end, it stated that students from outside the UK who enrolled in a course that included English Language were eligible for support, even if their course wasn’t full time.

I was shocked, and, to be honest, I was angry!I had paid into the system for years, paid my taxes, never claimed benefits and now, when I needed temporary support, I was rejected while others seemingly got help with fewer strings attached.

The Second Seed: Disappointment - This planted Seed No. 2: a deep disappointment in the system I had trusted. I felt like a second-class citizen in my own country.

Seed No. 3 - A Night in a Cell

This one’s harder to share.

After a night out drinking and arguing with my ex, I had a verbal altercation with a taxi driver. I didn’t physically attack anyone, but I was aggressive and loud; out of control. The police were called, and I spent the night in a cell to sober up.

That walk home the next morning was one of the hardest of my life. I felt ashamed, not of how others saw me, but of how I saw myself.

The Third Seed: Self-Reflection

That night forced me to reflect. I wasn’t proud of who I had become.It wasn’t just that one event, it was everything building up to it: relationship struggles, societal frustration, emotional exhaustion, and an underlying sadness.I was slowly becoming someone I didn’t recognise.

This third seed was a seed of shame, sadness, and self-reflection.And it was the most important of the three.

Conclusion: Seeds Take Time

These three experiences took place over the span of nearly a decade. But looking back, I see how they worked together to stir something deep inside me.

• Distrust in systems that should protect us.

• Disappointment in a government that seemed to prioritise others over its own people.

• Shame and reflection that made me question who I was becoming.

These seeds didn’t bear fruit right away. They simply took root. But over time, they would grow into something unexpected; a hunger for truth, purpose, and eventually… faith.

Click here to read part 3: bethanandmark.com/post/conspiracytochrist3